Day 82 - Cyprus V's China

I am fed up of the nagging, "where's your blog, where's your blog" (where's ya keys, where's ya phone) - the teenagers and the friends are driving me crazy to write my blog.... other's feel that they may have to subscribe to the Daily Mail again as I haven't been consistent.... However, tonight, after a couple of beers, I am going to attempt "the blog".


So, my very lucky 13 year old boy is going on holiday to Cyprus on Saturday with his best friend - he is flying Club Class and staying in the best hotel in the country!!!! Thanks to his lovely Mum and Nick, he will be flying off in luxury and staying in a five star hotel to die for...

So....

Luke's Club Class to Cypress

My flight to China

Luke's Hotel

My Hotel

Luke's Dining Table

I'll be lucky to find a box.... luxury!

My Bathroom Facilities

Luke's Bathroom Facilities

Luke's view from bedroom window

My view for 9 Days!

He is so excited, I gave him some money for flip flops!!

Work today was cool, I sold some raffle tickets and had a meeting to help the others in my team raise some money.... 

Tonight out with the girlies, had a few bottles of something I can't remember, chatted about "The Book" and realised that I am not the only one who is fed up with Anastasia having deep conversations with her Inner Goddess but also there seems to be a limit on the amount of times she can mention feeling the warmth of Mr Gray's shaft!!! However, I do feel that a little trip to Tesco to buy book Number 2 coming on!  Well, there is no action anywhere else so I will have to bask in hers I guess (or his)!!!!

Don't forget Sunday - 2pm till 4pm at The Pinner Arms

Families Welcome

Live Band

& Me! 

Day 81 Win a Holiday of a Lifetime

**** WIN A HOLIDAY OF A LIFETIME ****

Friends and Colleagues

How would you like to win luxury holiday accommodation set in some of the world’s best locations for up to SIX people?

Choose from

Spain

Turkey

Mexico

Dominica Republic

The Far East

Africa

USA

Canada

Europe

UK

To name but a few!

As most of you are aware, we are taking part in the expedition to walk the Great Wall of China in September 2012 in aid of Marie Curie Cancer Care.  We are all, in some way or another, touched by Cancer.

This is a one off opportunity to win such accommodation and to help out a good cause at the same time.

We are holding a raffle for accommodation ONLY with Club la Costa and a maximum of 3000 points will be rewarded to the winner.  This would cover accommodation from a wide selection of resorts for up to 6 people, subject to availability.  This could also include School Holidays!

This would typically be a two bedroom apartment with two bathrooms, a fully stocked kitchen with washing machine, dishwasher, microwave, fridge freezer, full oven and hob and a whole host of electrical devices. The apartments have air conditioning, maid service, Satellite TV (usually 3), DVD players, a safe, a balcony or terrace, some have inside and outside jacuzzis. The resorts have restaurants, sometimes a gym, several pools and information desks for organising transfer car hire or days out.

I only have one members pack but if you would like to see the quality and range of resorts, then I am more then happy to go through this with you. I will work closely with the winner to book and advise on the best options available.  The resorts are usually family resorts with excellent facilities but do differ depending on whether it is owned by Club la Costa or by a partner. The winner would be expected to conform to member and site rules.  The holiday accommodation will be valid until December 2014.

The offer only covers accommodation and the winner would be responsible for the cost of any flights, insurance, transfers (although some times these are covered depending on resort) and any on site fees or damage. Some resorts do operate on an ‘all inclusive’ basis and therefore a supplement would also be payable in such cases. No cash alternative would be offered and no responsibility can be taken for the failure of any service provider or inclement weather. The offer is made in good faith with the genuine desire to make this a wonderful experience for the winner.

If you want to be in with a chance to win such a fabulous opportunity then you need to buy a special raffle ticket which costs £10. These are available from either myself or Bethany Gevell in Customer Operations. The draw will take place on 25^th July 2012. If you wish to buy a ticket and cannot see one of us, e-mail us on Andrew.sales@camelotgroup.co.uk or beth.gevell@camelotgroup.co.ukand we will contact you.

Remember the money raised will go to Marie Curie Cancer Care.

As they say you need to be in it to win it

Good Luck!!!

Day 80 - Ambulance - Great Tits, Snake, Justin B & Jessie J

Today was just something else!

Woke up at the crack of dawn as the girls were desperate to practice on their roller skates. Lyndsay, being fantastic, dropped off Kate's at 8am but she came bounding into the house saying that there was an old lady who has collapsed to the floor just outside on the main road... so, Beth, in her inimitable fashion, yet again, in her Nighty.... yes, just my Nighty, a grey one with little hearts all over it, very low cut, obviously, no bra! goes zooming out of the house, without (yet again) a care in the world about her physical appearance, to run to the aid of said "old lady".

So, there I am, on the floor, my cushions supporting head and legs, put the old dear into the recovery position, take her pulse and call the ambulance.... Meanwhile, again, with boobs akimbo, I chat nonchalantly to the dear lady making sure she stays awake and calm.  In the back of my mind I do think that I ought to get on some decent attire before the ambulance men arrive, but there was no way I was going to leave her, she has my hand so tightly in her grasp, her breathing became erratic and her legs shaking uncontrollably.  Then, after about 15 minutes, a police van rolls up, they were just passing and probably wondered why someone was sitting indecently on the floor hunched over this dear old lady.

Obviously, it had to be two very good looking young policemen, I gave them all the details I had and caught one of them loosing eye contact with me which was a bit disconcerting, he was definitely distracted by my lack of dignity and buttons!  Another 15 minutes passed before the ambulance finally arrived, I was pretty horrified as to the time it took and they said they had come all the way from Chiswick as they were the only vehicle available!!!!! Wow! That is quite a worry!  By now, we had created a bit of a crowd, all seemed a bit like this had happened before..... even a little dog was added in this time.

My dear lady turned out to be a bit of a war heroine, born in 1922 (she told the policeman she was 21)  she told me some fascinating stores about when she was in Malaysia and was put in charge of a whole battalion, if we hadn't have been lying in the floor together I could have chatted to her for ages.  The ambulance men then expertly manoeuvred her onto the gurney and popped her in the back... off they went with my War Hero!

A great tit landed on my bird table today!

The rest of our day was spent lounging around in the garden, we had a water fight in the glorious sunshine and afterwards Hannah decided to pop her bra on the bird table to dry -  It is in fact the only tits that have landed there since I got it!

We then had a lovely visit from a completely charming young lady who works for Justin Bieber and Jessie J.  The kids have known her for a while but it is the first time that she has come to see us.  They sang in the garden together which was totally awesome and she told us some brilliant stories.  She has said that she would like to make a "cover" with Savannah Wow..... How fantastic would that be?

AND

Tango getting a Tan.. go!

To top the day off, Cassidy found TANGO! He was slithering down the stairs to come to see us all, his head was poking out between the banisters - we took him out with us in the garden to get some rays, it really was great to see him.

Now finally, after a totally hectic but fantastic weekend, the house is quiet, just Savannah and (person who shall be nameless) in the garden, I am now going to retire to read my very naughty book!

Good night, sweet dreams & have a great week x

Day 80 - 16 Kids & Karaoke Bar

Well, that was fun, I took 16 kids to the SYNC Bar for a taste of Karaoke, they loved it, they put on wigs and played with blow up guitars and sang their hearts out to the music, as they sang the coloured lights flashed in time with the music and they were in heaven.... louder and louder until it was completely inaudible.  Luckily it is all sound proofed so the other punters were not disturbed...

Back across the road for tea and a host of sandwiches and yummy food awaited them.  I bought some of those fab bubble tubes that you open and sway in the wind to make massive bubbles, 16 children in the garden all doing this was fantastic, there were bubbles everywhere and we wondered whose would fly the highest without popping!

Dahlia however, during the frivolities was hiding away reading her book (No.2 of 50 Shades of Gray) which she is totally addicted to.  As her two year old was mixing beautifully with the older kids, making them all laugh, microphone in hand, singing along merrily, Dahlia was sunning herself outside deep in her book!  I have become a bit bored with it to be honest, bored or jealous, I am not too sure, I am fed up with Anastasia referring to her "inner goddess" talking to her all the time (whose does that?), I mean, proper conversation - not only that, she talks back to it!!!

So, after all Mums & Dads had a wee dram of Pimms & Lemonade in the sun, most children left, only Brandon and Katie who are sleeping over again, it is like I have six children really but they are all happy chatting and to hear them giggling is the best noise you could ever hear, it is a natural high.  Girls all snuggled down with their snuggle buddies (Cassidy has a Unicorn and Katie a Monkey), Luke and Brandon, Savannah and "Guest who shall be nameless" in the garden and I may even be able to read another chapter of my book only for some reason................... I am shattered!!!!!!

Day 79 - I have won "Embarrassing Mother of the Year" Award

Oh, well, I found it very funny but a certain teenager was not laughing, as out loud, as I was!!

Savannah, will you enter me into this competition?

After yesterday's blog, I decided I had better lock myself in the bathroom before the entourage of teenagers piled up the stairs to say Hello!  Clad in nothing but a checked shirt that was covered in red hair dye, looking vaguely like I had been shot, my hair piled up on top of my head with red sploges seeping down my neck, I was far from a pretty sight!  So, Savannah, hurling herself upstairs, banging loudly on the bathroom door and asked, far from politely if I was in the bath, before I could answer she said "I HOPE YOU BURN!!!" Charming, I thought, and all that I do for you!


Little did I realise, or indeed remember how popular my blog had become, and unbeknown  to me, the kids were reading the blog outside in the garden.  My lovely Hannah read it out loud in front of "said boy" and Savannah.  This resulted in a "not so happy" daughter... I think I managed to get away with it saying that it was just a joke... lol... but probably not NOW.... Whilst rinsing out my hair, I laughed and laughed, making a terrible mess but it was the first laugh of the day and boy did I need it.

N.B if you don't know what I am talking about, you will have to read yesterday's blog.

Said couple were out in garden till 1am, so whatever I did I think I need thanking! Don't you?

Lawn mowed, gazebo up, garden cleared of all rubbish (two bins full), fish pond cleaned out, kids fed, house tidy (in preparation of 15 seven year olds tomorrow), three pages of my book read and once again, I have surplus children staying the night.  I do love it though, more the merrier. Tonight I have Henry (apparently Cassidy is only Number 5 on his girlfriend list) and Brandon (who I think is Number one on Luke's boyfriend list)... oh, go Beth, this is a sure way to get the kids to disown you.

Brigitte & Byron

Been feeling lonely today, one of my oldest friends Brigitte is emigrating to Australia on Monday with her man and their beautiful little boy Byron.  Chatting on the phone, I realised just how much I am going to miss them.  Although we don't see each other that often, we are true friends and pick up where we left off so easily.  I have known Brigitte since I was three years old, I used to hold on to her blonde bunches as we slid down the slide.  We used to tie our hands together with school ties and even with our hair, in order to be able to stay together after school.  We got into all sorts of trouble at school, we used to write so small that the teachers were unable to read our writing, I even remember being up in front of the headmaster who spanked our hands with a stick as we couldn't control our giggles when he told us off.

In my heart of hearts I know that this will be a fantastic move for them and now that I have a host of friends over the other side of the world, a trip will definitely be on the cards in a couple of years time.... when I win £75,000 at Deal or No Deal.

This evening I went on yet another walk around Pinner Hill - so, this was my second hour of walking today, this morning with Lyndsey and tonight with Les.  It was lovely in the dark, cool breeze but warm enough for a T-shirt, I felt I was on holiday in Portugal.

Day 78 - Red or Dead?

OK, so, still no snake, we have just about covered every inch of the room and even left out a mouse trap... literally... where can he be?  I have some friends that will NEVER come over to our house again unless he is found... do you think this is where the big snakes come from when they escape and go under the floor boards in search of mice?  Well, the cats are too old to hunt so may be he will be a good substitute... if anyone is particularly good at hunting, please can you pop in!

Walked to Ruth's with Luke today and back again, stopping off of course for tea that turned into a beer.  They now have a very cute little kitten called Domino that they picked him up from my friend Caroline yesterday.  He is desperately beautiful and a very lucky little thing to be part of their family !!!

7 week old Domino

So other events were my Mummy's birthday yesterday, she was feeling well enough thank goodness, to go out for lunch and then back to mine for her cake (Massimo custard tarts with candles in - what else!) and many orders for So Very Crafty made and posted.

Don't forget that I will be drawing the raffle at The Pinner Arms on the 3rd of June and will be there from 3 - 5, there will be an excellent live band and So Very Crafty too! So please feel free to come along for a few hours of fun with or without the kids, all welcome!  Entrance is free.

Suits me huh!

I am now sitting in the office semi naked, with my hair bathed in a red colour that could stop traffic and the door bell has just gone! A host of Savannah's friends (and the guy she can't stop thinking about... shushhh) all wanting to come to say helloooo to me..... hmmm, it could put this chap off for life along with all her friends!  When rinsing this stuff out it really looks like a blood bath.... I feel a prank coming on!

Here is hoping that tomorrow is another glorious day!  

I will walk up the stairs 20 times before going to bed to read my oh so rude book!  Night for now xxx

Day 77 - Has anyone seen a rather large Corn Snake?

Taken with her new camera

Was Cassidy's birthday yesterday and she had a lovely day at school, I got some little Lindt teddies for her to take in for her class mates and they went down a treat.  It is funny, just 7 and she seems more grown up somehow.

We went out for a family meal at Pizza Express and she just constantly made us laugh, she asked Luke what the ugly thing was on his neck....... then said "Oh, it is your head!" cheeky but mildly amuzing.

Today, I felt that a walk was in order, dropped Cassidy off at school and walked around to Ruth's for breakfast, did a bit of stripping of her wallpaper and then back through Pinner home... I am feeling like I haven't done any proper exercise all week and just can't get the enthusiasm going.

This afternoon, after completing many internet orders, I tried hard to get a few minutes to myself in order to read my book, but it is quite impossible, still only on the 200th page (with obvious distractions) I just can't seem to find the time, I have decided that the best way to get your child's attention is by relaxing on the bed looking comfortable!  I can hear my Mum saying "it is your fault, just close the door and ignore them", the trouble is with being a parent that by the time you are experienced, you are unemployed!!!!!!

Tango!!! On the loose!

On route through Pinner I went to buy food for the snake today (it is wrong and I hate it but the thing has to eat)... spent £21 on a new bulb for him too.  Went into Luke's room, fitted up the light, all working and in good order, fantastic, popped back downstairs to get the little frozen mouse, back to Luke's room and NO SNAKE!!! I hadn't closed it properly and the bugger has escaped... I have pulled Luke's room apart trying to find him but no joy..... So, I have a hungry snake on the loose - best keep an eye on the Hamster!!!

Now, the whole day has passed and still no sign of Tango, I have searched just about every inch of Luke's room and now wondering if he has ventured further!  I keep seeing those bullets from Luke's Nerf gun lying all around the house and keep thinking that I have found him!!

Today I heard back from the Royal Academy, after much consideration and viewing 11,000 works of art, they have decided not to include my paintings in their Summer Exhibition.  Obviously they don't know talent when they see it... lol, I would have been more amazed if they had of accepted them... they were rubbish! But it was fun giving it a go.  I have been asked to put them up at the Dental Surgery for sale - obviously when people are pumped full of Lidocaine and epinepherine then they may even think they are quite good!

Right, more orders to complete - have a good night my lovely people and if anyone can help me with not eating Cake then I will be very grateful......

Day 76 - Little Cock and The Red Arrows!

Wow, what a weekend, working the Rickmansworth Festival and still cold through to the bone!  It was a great weekend made even better by the viewing of the Red Arrows, a Lancashire Bomber and four Spitfires!  See, I told you to join me...

Good Photo Huh!

"People watching" was also quite a highlight, who would have thought that there would be such an amazing array of people in Rickmansworth, it was a little like Camden on a Sunday morning.  And, dogs were just about everywhere, every bread, every colour, every shape - I think I have decided that I would like a Cockapoo or a Cocker Spaniel, they are very cute, I have been warned off getting a Boarder Collie that I have wanted for years and this seems like a pretty good alternative - oh so cute!! What do you think?  Apart from the fact that I might need to get a second mortgage to afford one... he is pretty irresistible.

I want him!

Really busy with So Very Crafty, apart from the fact that the Windchimes I was selling were driving me crazy and making me want to go to the loo every 10 minutes.... I can still hear the tinkling in my ears!  Thank you to all of you who managed to come and keep me company, especially Dad, Les, Ruth & Jane who all got me tea and Cake/Fudge/Chocolate Peanuts... yum...

Cassidy's 7th Birthday tomorrow so short but sweet blog as my fingers are still cold!  Presents to wrap and housework to get done... a woman's work huh!

Massive thank you to Gilda & Family for the very generous £50 donation and my beautiful friend Mersedes for her £50.00 donation today too!  xxx

Love you all
B x

Day 75 - VERY RUDE BOOK!!!!!

Well, there is a very good explanation as to why I haven't written my blog.  I was hauled over to Tesco by Dahlia in order to purchase a new book that is apparently sweeping the Nation of Women Only.  She has a copy but insisted I buy my own and only when I started reading did I discover the reason why!  OMG, it is a very RUDE book!!!

I have a rather diverse number of books on the go at the moment, "Hunger Games" which is a pretty dark vision of the near future where twelve boys and twelve girls are forced to appear in a live TV show.  There is only one rule: Kill or be Killed!  My next book is "Call the Midwife" (did you see the series?  I loved it), it is based on a true story by Jennifer Worth about the East End in the 1950's, where babies were born in slum conditions, often with no running water and quite disturbing events unfold.  Then the third book, and the latest purchase... well, I never, this is called "Fifty Shades of Grey", I do believe it should be called "Fifty Shades of Blush Pink" but who am I to judge.... it is the first book that I snatched off Luke quicker than lightening when he attempted to read the synopsis!!  However, it is strangely addictive and a sight more interesting than recording my daily events (well, the events that I feel able to record anyway...lol).

So, to wrap that up, it is clear that I am the sort of person who not only is too busy to read a book but one that can survive in the forest under attack, help women give birth under difficult circumstances and have sex all at the same time... Now, that is impressive huh!

Due to being massively busy, I have only managed a few chapters whilst Cassidy reads her guided reading book (it does feel slightly wrong) and in between catching up on So Very Crafty orders and preparing for the weekend at Rickmansworth Festival and working at Camelot and doing the housework, cooking, washing and cleaning and organizing kids and extra kids that I seem to have and obviously TRAINING!!!! - these books may take a while to get through!


Please come down and see me at the Festival, it is an amazing day out for all the family with live bands and over 50 amazing stall holders with items that are not on the High Street.  I have a bright pink Gazebo so you can't miss me and will have an array of wind chimes hanging from it so you will be able to hear me too!  It would be great to see you and to have a little company as I will be there all day this Saturday and Sunday - you can bring Cake if you really love me xxx

However, in the midst of all this, Luke and I have been on several walks totally so far about 14 miles!  I have a walking buddy and I am thoroughly enjoying his company.

Day 74 - Kill or Cure with Zumba!

That's me on the left!

Decided that now I have been fully recharged I need to get back into the “Keep Fit” game.

So, I walked Cassidy to school this morning, she was more than happy with this as she was going back for tea with her boyfriend Max and full of the joys of Spring.

From school, to the gym for a workout session, it was strange, I looked through the window when I first arrived and thought I was really early, made myself a coffee and started texting a friend.  When I finally looked up, I was quite late and walked into the session whilst everyone had already started.  I hate this, I felt such an idiot trying to avoid getting smacked on the head by a bar or knocked sideways by one of the Amazonian woman pumping iron!  Made my way to the weights and chose my little yellow ones (not much heavier than a polo mint Dad so nothing to worry about), then managed to find a small space to park myself, I was squashed between a woman with a six pack and arms like Schwarzenegger and my 70 year old friend Sonia.  Sonia is about five foot tall, about 7 stone and the fittest lady I think I have ever met (even put’s Rachel to shame). I watched her in disbelief as I just couldn’t keep up! The weights she had were four times heavier than mine and my arms were four times fatter!  During a quick “sip of water” break, she pointed out her boyfriend who was working out in the gym – this “young” man looks a little like a blonde George Cloony – talk about fit…… I felt a pang of jealously waive over me and the lady is 70!!!

Half way through the instruction said Lunge and I was convinced he said “Lunch” and was ready to walk out, I had so had enough.  Apparently you have to push through the pain but I had pain in the warm up so I didn’t hold out much hope.

After the killer session, I thought that I would give the Zumba class a go.  Now Zumba, for those of you who don’t know, is the only Latin-inspired dance-fitness programme that blends red-hot international music, and contagious steps to form a “fitness-party” that is quite addictive.  It is like Salsa but on your own.

Well, kill or cure I say.  The instruction was a slim, Italian chap called Davido, very camp and teaches Salsa too, he had a wiggle that would put Elvis to shame and camped it up something rotten, the Rock ‘N’ Roll music came on and Davido put on his hat and Rocked it and I came into my own!!!! it was like a light went off in my feet as soon as “my” music started!  I LOVED this class, the music blasted and I just wiggled my way through the lesson pretending I was some kind of scintillatingly sassy Salsa Dancer.

I know what you're thinking -
"It would have been easier to dance
 if I wore my trainers!"

Day 73 How to Answer Questions on "The Belly Button"

Warning... DO NOT GOOGLE "BELLY BUTTON"
I HAVE WARNED YOU

Had a funny morning with Cassidy

We were having a snuggle in bed before school and our cat, Skye, was suckling at the collar of Cassidy's P.J top (Skye is 16 years old but still thinks she is a kitten).  Cassidy asked what she was doing and this led into an bombardment of questions.

Cassidy: "Why is she doing that Mummy?"
Mum: "Well, she thinks you are her Mummy" 
Cassidy: "How can she think that, I'm not a Cat"
Mum: "No, but she loves you and wishes you were her Mummy"
Cassidy: "But what is she doing?"
Mum: "Looking for Milk"

Cassidy Laughs out loud

Cassidy: "Where from?"
Mum: "Your Bobbies"
Cassidy: "Don't be silly", why would there be milk in there?
Mum:  Well, when you get pregnant your boobs make Milk"
Cassidy: "How?"
Mum: "It is all very clever"
Cassidy:  "How many babies did Skye have?"
Mum: "Five"
Cassidy: "Why didn't you keep them all?"
Mum: "Well, Five kitten's would have been too many cats so I decided to keep the runt of the litter - Pumpkin".
Cassidy:  "What does 'Runt' mean Mummy"?
Mum:  "Well, it is the kitten that is a bit stupid, the weakest one in the litter, strange, chubby and Ginger and has a crocked tail!"
Cassidy:  "Is that why you kept Luke?"

Mum: Laughs out loud and almost falls out of bed.

N.B This has NOT been proof read by Luke before publishing!

Followed by


Mum:  "Cass, Do you know why we have a belly button?"
Cassidy:  "Yes, of course I do"
Mum:  "Why then?"
Cassidy:  "To keep our boggies in!!!"
Mum:  "Well...." I sighed .
Cassidy: "Or, wax, and it is also used so that you can blow raspberries into it."
Mum: "Actually,  did you know that I used to feed you through your belly button."
Cassidy: Laughing out loud.... "WHAT.... With a spoon?"


Later in the afternoon, whilst Cassidy was at a friends, Savannah (whilst in Massimo) devised a game - 'Tell me something I don't know about you!', so, taking it in turns I am not sure who was most shocked, Savannah, myself or Luke who was overhearing!  However, Luke apparently likes older women and has a secret drawer with play toys...

Found this amazing clip.... copy and paste into URL and enjoy  - love you all and Goodnight xxx

http://www.facebook.com/l.php?u=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.wimp.com%2Fcatdolphins%2F&h=CAQFL_WEnAQExtsICi1JagdQTGrV78xy4jJTIGMGpgZ6w6w

Day 72 - Recharging and Boob Reduction

I had the appointment with my consultant today and as I entered the room he asked me to strip off (get my boobs out!)  After an examination and the most action I have had in a while, he gets his knife and very long needle and injects the implant into my right hip/buttock!  Slight prick... hmmmm.  We have a little light conversation about the Great Wall of China whilst he cuts into my skin and I commented on the fact that I felt like a Duracell Bunny whose batteries were indeed very low! His reply was "it just wont do to have a bunny with low batteries".

He read my blog after I mentioned that he was staring in the "I found my Knickers" episode and wouldn't let me leave the consultation room until I shared the link address with him.  It made me laugh out loud when he read "My Consultant has very little, if any, bedside manner",  I was so embarrassed but somewhat bemused that he would question my judgement.  However, I did leave with £20.00 sponsorship for Marie Curie and a bill for £300!!!!

This man, however, saved my life - quite literally, he worked wonders and ventured to parts that others refused to reach.  Mr Sheridan, if you are reading the follow up, thank you from the bottom of my heart for everything you have done for me, a year ago the Great Wall of China or indeed just walking up my stairs was a challenge in itself.  The six monthly visits to see you are also very worthwhile, not only for the camaraderie but for re-charging my batteries and making me feel human again. (not that I would be throwing away my bunny ears of course).

This is NOT Savannah

In the evening Luke took me and the girls out for Dinner, how lovely is that.  He wanted to spend some of him birthday money to treat us.  We had a great time and an interesting conversation with Savannah who was asking me if I would pay for her to have a boob reduction.  She commented that they were getting bigger by the day and that one was bigger than the other, Luke said "What, by, a Metric Tonne?" I do think that you could sail away in her bra's, now GG's.  Cassidy commented that she enjoys jumping on them when she is bored!

N.B. This has been proof read by Savannah before Publishing!

Day 71 - Duracell Bunny

So sorry that I haven't done my blog in a while, not been feeling myself (not that I make a habit out of feeling myself but you know what I mean).  I figured out why, after my operation I have to have an implant, this is similar to a Duracell Battery.  The life of this "Battery" is just six months and I am over a month overdue, so just like a kids toy that has been overused,  I am slow and tired and just want to sleep.  

Reminds me of the comment my friend made the other day, she had to use the batteries from her "toy" to put into her little girls Wii Remote Control.... made me think, "surely it should be the other way around?".  

I have an appointment booked with Consultant tomorrow afternoon so should be firing on all cylinders then.

Luke had an interesting time out with his Dad the other day, I overheard the conversation he was having on the phone and it went something like "it will be an experience of a lifetime Luke", my curiosity got the better of me and I just had to ask Luke where he was going.  The answer didn't really shock me having lived with his Dad for 17 years but it was a little more out of the box than usual.  "He is taking me to have a go on a time machine!", "humm, that's nice Luke", I heard myself say, (well honestly, what else can you say?).  I did however text him later that evening, I thought that if he went back to 1970 it would be quite nice for him to say hello to my Zada for me. Luke is quite an amazing kid, he has the ability to amuse his Dad to get his attention but also to keep grounded and secretly think that his Dad is a fruitcake.

On his return the next day, I was mildly interested in how his evening went.  Luke explained that it was a bright lamp with LED lights that shine fiercely into your face whilst listening to hemi sync music whilst wearing a blindfold and earphones.  Then, you get a sensation of floating outside your body and perceiving your physical body from a place outside your body... get it!?  Or, an OBE (Out of body experience), other names for this are astral projection, soul travel or even spirit walking.  I guess if anyone has ever had a near death experience you may understand this a little better.  Personally, I feel it is tricking the brain but I have to keep objective.

I also think that if someone was shining a mega bright light into your face and gave you some loud weird music to listen to whilst relaxing in a comfy chair - all sorts of things can happen!  Luke experienced some bright colours and a feeling of paralysis.  He didn't however, end up in the 1970's which I was quite disappointed about cause I thought my Zada would love to hear from me.  Arh well, may be next time.

Apparently, the machine costs £18,000 and Todd may purchase one to go into the church that he is buying for two Million.  I asked Luke where he was planning to get the money from for these two items, and with his fingers acting as quotation marks he said

"THE UNIVERSE"

So, if anyone has heard of "The Bank of the Universe" please can you give them my number because I sure can do with a loan.

Day 70 - Naked Again - Oh Dear Lord!

A little observation... how come when I have a juicy subtitle to my blog pages I get well over double the amounts of hits?  Singing in the Rain = 56 v's I am so ashamed = 142 - Marie Curie & Me = 35 v's I thought my friend and ex husband had died = 215 - So this is the reason for my blog title today. I am curious to know how many hits I get with this - it has no bearing on the content - sorry to disappoint!  P.S. The people viewing from Mombasa please reveal yourselves!

Anyway, not really feeling myself today (not that I make a habit out of feeling myself) but just feel a bit flat.

I received this email today from "Go Ape" where I took the kids the other week... made me laugh!!!

Knitting News! (well I have to keep her happy - she is one of my bestest friends after all!)

Gino

My friend Sarah wants to knit me this!!! I really hate to say it but it is absolutely fantastic and I could put it in the tree where Gino used to live.... Sarah, I really do want one please!!! and, forgive all my previous comments, I will delete them and will honour your knitting abilities till the day I die (then you could knit me a daffodil (my favorite flowers by the way if anyone was thinking of buying any for me when I die or indeed when I am still alive would be preferable)

Oh Dear Lord!!!

And his friends!

Busy day, cleared front garden, planted a few pretties, mowed lawn, cleaned house, shopping and finished off Memory Box for First Holy Communion, made four candles (not fork handles) and did a show with So Very Crafty!  Entertained a house full of  children, cooked and cleaned and all feeling a bit like rubbish!  I did however put on  my Wonder Woman knickers this morning in the hope that something amazing  would happen and I guess having the ability to get through the day was wonder  enough. 1st Holy Communion Box  Tonight I have five children and I love it, the more the merrier I say - just eaten  copious amounts of junk food and don't really care - tomorrow is another day.

Day 69 - Singing in the Rain

75 years on and what a treat.  I took Cassidy to see Singing in the Rain at the Palace Theatre last night.  It was totally amazing and I had a blow by blow account of what was going to happen next as it is Cassidy's favorite movie of all time (all six years of them).

It was a mind blowing production that was rightly given a standing ovation, I just wish that I could have taken Savannah and Luke too.  The adaptation was out of this world and Gene, Donald and Debbie would have been so proud to have seen it.

Little comments during the show just melted my heart... like

"Mum, is that real rain?"  (The audience in the front were drenched as they were showered with "Singing in the Rain"

and

"How long do I have with this telescope before it runs out", (I feel old as I remember paying 2p for the binoculars when I was younger and now it costs £1.00).

and "this is better than the movie" and

"When is the policeman coming on, he should have been on stage by now because in the movie".. in the movie, in the movie, bla bla bla... she was like a movie critic, she couldn't take her eyes off the stage and I enjoyed every moment not only through my eyes but through hers too.


Cassidy slept with her programme last night and has taken it into school this morning for "Show and Tell", she also took with her the lyrics to "Moses Supposes" and has learnt them by heart already!


Check out this link.... short clip from the production.... guess how many times Cassidy has watched it already?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KOiIGUg6yLI&feature=email

Cassidy's Comments

On Thursday mummy and I went to the palace theatre  to see singing in the rain there were lots of decorations there. My favorite song was singing in the rain because he splashed in the rain that was falling from the ceiling and the front row had to were plastic coats over them because he splashed it all over them! and I am so lucky because mummy is going to take me to Matilda in London as well.




                                           

Day 68 - I found my knickers!

Now... the cake box is empty and I had to tackle Savannah to the floor so that she wouldn't read out the calories for each slice... I actually tried to eat the box too so that I wouldn't find out!

Good News

I found my Wonder Woman knickers today - these are very special to me, I actually think they had a small part in saving my life.  Now, I know that sounds a bit ridiculous but last year I had a pretty big Operation, I had a rough time of it and the final result was a Hysterectomy.

I was gutted (excuse the pun) and petrified, and I remember the lead up to the operation very well.  Ruth drove me into Spires and I was shown to my room, all very posh.

Talk about an amazing friend, she was incredible (I am so lucky to have such great people in my life).  She had a little present for me and it was the pair of Wonder Women knickers that I found today.  I put them on my head just before my Consultant came into the room to give me the brief (another pun lol) of events that I was about to undertake.  We had a giggle, (hence new knickers!) wondering if he would say anything about my new "head" attire.  He said nothing, he looked at me, then back to Ruth, took the price tag with the Wonder Woman logo and attached it to the front page of my notes.

From them on.. I was known as Wonder Woman and knew that this operation was going to be a total success and I would pull through, spin around and indeed, become Wonder Woman.

My Consultant, Mr Sheridan was very matter-of-fact kind of man, with quite a dry sense of humor and very little bedside manner, if any.  I asked him if he would mind giving me a tummy tuck whist I am knocked out which is no less that I deserved after my past ordeals. With a wry smile his reply was "I could, but then it will just make the rest of you look fat"... I got him back... he was just about to examine me yet again, I felt like I was having some kind of romantic relationship with him.  I just felt it necessary as he put on his rubber gloves to say "arn't you going to kiss me first?"

Ruth stayed the whole time I was there being sliced open and when I came around, she had my knickers all save and sound.. I think they were on her head but I may have been hallucinating with all the drugs I was on!

Outcome is that I am now fitter than I have ever been, pain free and even without the tummy tuck the knickers don't look that bad on! And now, against all the odds I am going to Walk the Great Wall of China where the flat level sections of the challenge are restricted to the first and last 10 minutes of each day, at all the other times it will be either going up hill or down hill.  It is often very steep and most of the trekking will be ascending and descending flights of very uneven and irregular steps.  There are some scrambling sections on the ascent onto the wall and the descent from it, it will consist of walking on rough, uneven ground at very steep gradients - this is something that I would NEVER have thought possible for me to do - still a massive challenge but I am determined not to be beaten.

THANK YOU ALL FOR YOUR SUPPORT

 XXX

http://www.justgiving.com/beth-routt

Day 67 - I am so ashamed!

It;s gone - almost all of it, every hour I take another little slither, it is the most delicious stuff I have ever eaten.... it is sort of a flat cake with daim bar crumbled all over it and smothered in that lovely daim bar chocolate.... oh, even thinking of it makes me want to raid the fridge again, by the end of tonight, it will be gone... I just know it!

Last night I just wasn't in the mood at all to write my blog... it was a tough day and at work in the evening Jane made it very very clear that even if she had a dagger through her heart and hot pokers coming out of her eyes, even if she were (god forbid) in a car accident, if I was there.... I am to put on some clothes before helping her.  She said "the last thing I want to see before I die is you naked" - charming! It actually made me question 1)  If I would actually help her anyway and 2. If she had hot pokers in her eyes she wouldn't see me!  However Jane, if this were ever the case and you need help for anything, rest assured I will strip off naked, even if it is just help with the washing up!

We were trying to think of a topic for yesterday;s blog and came up with writing about "The Perfect Man"... this is how far we got before we got bored.

1.  Does he exist?
2.  Where does he live?

That is it.... done.  If anyone has the answers to these questions then I would be very pleased to hear them.

My new Dentist

I went to the dentist this morning.  I have a lovely dentist called Sarah, she is from New Zealand and over the years we have become quite good friends.  She is fantastic with the kids and treats me like one of them. ie. she makes sure that I have enough drugs as possible so it doesn't hurt... I even get a sticker if I am a good girl.  Well, Sarah is going home to New Zealand in a few months and I am very upset, I am not keen on my new dentist and will miss her very much!

Sarah

We discuss all sorts of things whilst I am in the chair.  Well, she does do most of the talking because I've usually got something like a big hunk of cotton wool stuck in my mouth... or her fist!!  She has a husband that collects Coffee Machines, apparently they are everywhere in the house, huge, massive things, they don't work, he just likes them.  It made me laugh as Todd used to collect saws.. all sorts of saws, big ones with big teeth and bigger ones with even bigger teeth and smaller big teethed ones and two handed ones, ones with old handles and ones with small old ones... I actually still have them in the shed - FASCINATING HUH!! All those teeth - at least Sarah seemed interested!!!

Sarah has asked if I can bring in some of my artwork for them to sell in the surgery,  I thought it might be a good idea to take a couple of pieces with the proceeds going towards Marie Curie... must think about which ones to take - the best ones of course are at the Royal Academy awaiting approval.... lol.